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Patriarchy Stress Disorder: The Invisible Inner Barrier to Women's Happiness and Fulfillment

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Despite checking off the boxes of worldly accomplishments, most high-achieving women are secretly dissatisfied. They feel stuck in lives that look perfect on the outside, yet on the inside, they're unfulfilled, plagued by the nagging feeling that there's got to be more. They feel guilty and ungrateful for feeling trapped in lives that are so good. They disown their pain, o Despite checking off the boxes of worldly accomplishments, most high-achieving women are secretly dissatisfied. They feel stuck in lives that look perfect on the outside, yet on the inside, they're unfulfilled, plagued by the nagging feeling that there's got to be more. They feel guilty and ungrateful for feeling trapped in lives that are so good. They disown their pain, or numb it with excessive work, eating, drinking, shopping, social media, or exercising. They search for solutions in books, meditation, yoga, therapy, medication, and workshops, but something is still missing. They wonder: What's wrong with me? Dr. Valerie Rein has worked with hundreds of high-achieving women and discovered that the issues they all struggle with are not just personal—they're rooted in the ancestral and collective trauma experienced by women in the patriarchal world for millennia. In Patriarchy Stress Disorder, Dr. Rein describes how this trauma creates an invisible inner prison, that holds them back from stepping into the full power of their authentic presence, unbridled joy, outrageous success, freedom, and fulfillment. In this book, Dr. Valerie explains: - Why you're dissatisfied in spite of your achievements, and why it's not your fault. - What secretly drains 90 percent of your time and energy, and how to reclaim it. - How to upgrade your game of "How much can I bear?" to "How good can it get?"


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Despite checking off the boxes of worldly accomplishments, most high-achieving women are secretly dissatisfied. They feel stuck in lives that look perfect on the outside, yet on the inside, they're unfulfilled, plagued by the nagging feeling that there's got to be more. They feel guilty and ungrateful for feeling trapped in lives that are so good. They disown their pain, o Despite checking off the boxes of worldly accomplishments, most high-achieving women are secretly dissatisfied. They feel stuck in lives that look perfect on the outside, yet on the inside, they're unfulfilled, plagued by the nagging feeling that there's got to be more. They feel guilty and ungrateful for feeling trapped in lives that are so good. They disown their pain, or numb it with excessive work, eating, drinking, shopping, social media, or exercising. They search for solutions in books, meditation, yoga, therapy, medication, and workshops, but something is still missing. They wonder: What's wrong with me? Dr. Valerie Rein has worked with hundreds of high-achieving women and discovered that the issues they all struggle with are not just personal—they're rooted in the ancestral and collective trauma experienced by women in the patriarchal world for millennia. In Patriarchy Stress Disorder, Dr. Rein describes how this trauma creates an invisible inner prison, that holds them back from stepping into the full power of their authentic presence, unbridled joy, outrageous success, freedom, and fulfillment. In this book, Dr. Valerie explains: - Why you're dissatisfied in spite of your achievements, and why it's not your fault. - What secretly drains 90 percent of your time and energy, and how to reclaim it. - How to upgrade your game of "How much can I bear?" to "How good can it get?"

30 review for Patriarchy Stress Disorder: The Invisible Inner Barrier to Women's Happiness and Fulfillment

  1. 4 out of 5

    Brooke Law

    Patriarchy Stress Disorder is one of the most seminal feminist works of our time. It shows us the way forward to creating a more egalitarian culture - one where the feminine and the masculine are honored equally. This book was an intense revealing of trauma I didn't know I had - the trauma of growing up as a woman in a patriarchal society. It is thoughtfully written, beautifully researched and tells personal stories to connect you with the material. I had the pleasure of interviewing Dr. Valerie i Patriarchy Stress Disorder is one of the most seminal feminist works of our time. It shows us the way forward to creating a more egalitarian culture - one where the feminine and the masculine are honored equally. This book was an intense revealing of trauma I didn't know I had - the trauma of growing up as a woman in a patriarchal society. It is thoughtfully written, beautifully researched and tells personal stories to connect you with the material. I had the pleasure of interviewing Dr. Valerie in my book club. Check it out here: https://youtu.be/lfH89A8A_7A

  2. 5 out of 5

    Aneta

    Interesting topic but this book could have been shorter, like half of it. It's being repetitive in the American way, going all over the same ideas multiple times. I enjoyed it though, at least first 40% of it. Idea of genetically inherited trauma was very interesting to me.

  3. 5 out of 5

    Rosella LaFevre

    Read if you feel chronically anxious, unsafe, frustrated, or unable to create your big dreams This is one of those books I was guided to through interesting little strokes of universal magic, and it truly feels like a gift. I noticed myself feeling anxious and unsafe at the end of 2019, even as I realized that I'm doing better financially than ever, and actually, wouldn't you know it makes perfect sense that my awareness that in some ways my life is better than ever would be the time I'd feel mos Read if you feel chronically anxious, unsafe, frustrated, or unable to create your big dreams This is one of those books I was guided to through interesting little strokes of universal magic, and it truly feels like a gift. I noticed myself feeling anxious and unsafe at the end of 2019, even as I realized that I'm doing better financially than ever, and actually, wouldn't you know it makes perfect sense that my awareness that in some ways my life is better than ever would be the time I'd feel most afraid of the other shoe dropping. Now, I'd previously read The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks (referenced in Dr. Rein's Patriarchy Stress Disorder), but that's apparently not the book I needed at this time. I needed Dr. Rein's book! It's well written and contains many explanations of what Patriarchy Stress Disorder is, how it affects women (and men), practical exercises for creating a feeling of safety (before we move on to creating actual pleasure), and stories of women who've made the "jailbreak." This is absolutely a book I'll reference and re-read in the future as I work the concepts. I've already noticed a shift in my sense of safety, awareness of my own "prison guards," and ability to perceive pleasure. Highly recommend!

  4. 4 out of 5

    Wendi

    I give this book a 4.5... Not a 5 because I still can't get passed the title and my impression, somehow, of implied victimhood. HOWEVER, this book is still incredibly relevant and eye-opening. A few passages to tease, not to spoil: -- "Women’s empowerment has gotten hijacked by the patriarchal over culture and became about giving a women the “opportunity” to burn herself out by working harder and doing more while still playing by the patriarchal rules. They used to burn us at the stake— now they I give this book a 4.5... Not a 5 because I still can't get passed the title and my impression, somehow, of implied victimhood. HOWEVER, this book is still incredibly relevant and eye-opening. A few passages to tease, not to spoil: -- "Women’s empowerment has gotten hijacked by the patriarchal over culture and became about giving a women the “opportunity” to burn herself out by working harder and doing more while still playing by the patriarchal rules. They used to burn us at the stake— now they just hand us the torches." -- Warren Buffett spoke to this cultural conditioning in the documentary Becoming Warren Buffett. “My sisters are fully as smart as I am,” he said, “they got better personalities than I have, but they got the message that their future was limited, and I got the message that the sky is the limit. It was the culture.” This unconscious privilege of men under patriarchy is still being believed in today. They are born into the culture where they see 95% of Fortune 500 companies are run by men, the country where 100% of presidents have been male. No matter what pretty words about women’s empowerment are placed in commencement speeches and social media memes, as long as women don’t see themselves represented in places of power, the message we receive and imprint is: you’re worth LESS. -- So many powerful, accomplished women get trapped into thinking: this shouldn’t be affecting me, it’s so minor, I should just get over this. It happened a long time ago. These are the prison guards speaking. They rationalize these emotions away. it’s not that bad. -- Settling for the safety of the status quo is a popular choice in our culture. The path of creation lies outside of the safety parameter. Every big "yes" begins with a big "no." A worthwhile book to get and to share with your mother, your sister, your daughter, your girlfriend.

  5. 4 out of 5

    Christina Fortin

    This book was such a major influencer in my life path thus far. Highly recommend reading this, even more recommend reading it as part of a book club! The club that I was apart of created the safe space that Dr. Valerie talks about in the book to work through our personal prison guards. We had the great honor of having our final virtual coven gathering starring Dr. Valerie herself! Very grateful of her to share her time, guidance, support with us. 🙏🏽🌞 Practicing moving out of my mind and back into This book was such a major influencer in my life path thus far. Highly recommend reading this, even more recommend reading it as part of a book club! The club that I was apart of created the safe space that Dr. Valerie talks about in the book to work through our personal prison guards. We had the great honor of having our final virtual coven gathering starring Dr. Valerie herself! Very grateful of her to share her time, guidance, support with us. 🙏🏽🌞 Practicing moving out of my mind and back into my body has been the best blessing of my life and that’s a major concept of what Dr. Valerie’s work supports.

  6. 5 out of 5

    Kristin

    Every woman, every person, should read this book. It helps to understand how trauma shows up in the world for so many people, even those who have not experienced a traumatic event. The book shows what that trauma looks like in day-to-day life, and it gives a clear path forward - active steps you can take to heal and grow.

  7. 4 out of 5

    Safiya Robinson

    A great read I enjoyed not only reading the theory but loved the success stories and the practical tools given here can start anyone on their way to “jailbreak” and thriving. I Highly recommend this book

  8. 5 out of 5

    Amy Weintraub

    This book was a powerful wakeup call for me. It put family legacy issues in perspective. I highly recommend it.

  9. 4 out of 5

    Luana

    It's not the sort of book that I'd usually pick up, but I'm grateful for the challenging questions it asked.

  10. 4 out of 5

    Morgan Evans

    The premise was sort of interesting but I felt the book was very repetitive and could have been shorter. It reads like a self help book which I have a hard time paying attention to.

  11. 4 out of 5

    Carissa Ford

    Lots of takeaways.

  12. 5 out of 5

    Camille DeAngelis

  13. 4 out of 5

    lauren

  14. 4 out of 5

    Sarah Lowell

  15. 4 out of 5

    Bethany Cole

  16. 4 out of 5

    Kristin Genovese

  17. 5 out of 5

    Allison Mitch

  18. 4 out of 5

    Kathryn Martin

  19. 5 out of 5

    Trista Hendren

  20. 5 out of 5

    Sam

  21. 5 out of 5

    Kristen Davis

  22. 4 out of 5

    Michelle

  23. 4 out of 5

    D Emonds

  24. 5 out of 5

    Rebecca Toner

  25. 4 out of 5

    Mallory

  26. 4 out of 5

    Ruth

  27. 4 out of 5

    Kate Kordsmeier

  28. 5 out of 5

    Jacqueline Fisch

  29. 5 out of 5

    Amanda

  30. 4 out of 5

    Megan Bennett

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